WE'RE OPEN, BUT NOT ANSWERING!
Customer: I've been calling 700-1000 for two days and can't get through. Can you help?
Operator: Where did you get that number, sir?
Customer: It's on the door of the business.
Operator: Sir, those are the hours that the business is open.
HELLO IS JACK THERE?
From a large Electronics manufacturer:
Caller: Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?
Operator: I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about.
Caller: On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?
Operator: I think it means the telephone plug on the wall.
IT'S MY _AVORITE _ESTAURANT!
Caller: I'd like the number of the Argo Fish Bar, please.
Operator: I'm sorry, there's no listing. Are you sure that the spelling is correct?
Caller: Well, it used to be called the Bargo Fish Bar but the 'B' fell off.
NO PEN? NO WORRIES!
On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a worried operator: "I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on."
WHEN WRITE IS WRONG...
Tech Support: I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.
Tech Support: Did you get a pop-up menu?
Tech Support: OK. Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?
Tech Support: OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?
Customer: Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'.
DID A DELOREAN COME WITH THIS PC?
Caller: I deleted a file from my PC last week and I just realized that I need it. So, if I turn my system clock back two weeks will I get my file back again?
WHAT WILL THEY THINK OF NEXT?
An employee called our corporate help desk. He told me the coffee cup holder on his computer broke, and that he needed a new one. I was clueless as to what he was referring to. After a while I realized that he was talking about the CD tray. So I probed further, and he verified that a button on the front of the computer produces a "drink caddy" in the lower corner of his computer. He said, "You know, it's just like the one they put in automobiles." I said, "Not exactly...."