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Mobile Neighbors
Anger Management
Agent:
Thank you for contacting <company> about your wireless service, my name is Christina, how can we help today?
Customer:
I get free mobile to mobile calling on my current plan but I am getting charged for mobile to mobile calls.
Agent:
Well OK, can I get the numbers you’re dialing so I can check them in my system?

Customer provides me with the numbers and I check them to see if they are of the same service provider to qualify as “mobile to mobile”.

Agent:
Well there is the problem ma'am, these numbers are from a different service provider and therefore do not qualify for mobile to mobile.
Customer:
But they’re my neighbors!!
Agent:
Yes, but your neighbors are not one of our customers.
Customer:
But they’re in a mobile home!!
Be Kind, Just Be Kind.
Rep:
How may I help you?
Caller:
I have spent all week trying to rewind my DVD. How do you rewind it?
Rep:
Where are you calling from?
Caller:
My kitchen.
Agent:
Thank you for contacting <company> support, how can we help today?
Customer:
Well I have a problem with anger.
Agent:
*Hesitates for customer to elaborate* Ok…, well how can I help with your blackberry today?
Agent:
Well you see, one day my blackberry was vibrating, it just kept vibrating and vibrating and vibrating! it just wouldn’t stop! So I grabbed it, and I threw it against a wall and it shattered into a million pieces!
Agent:
*Assesses the situation* Ah, so you’re looking for repair and exchange options today?
Customer:
Yes, yes exactly.
Agent:
I understand it's shattered, do you happen to see a piece that you used to insert the battery into? It should have a white sticker on it.
Customer:
Well that’s another problem you see, after I broke my device I gathered up the pieces and I burnt them!
Agent:
Y-you burnt the pieces of your broken blackberry sir?
Customer:
*insane raspy voice*  It just wouldn’t stop…vibrating.
Agent:
Ok sir, I apologize but due to the nature of the damage, this would be deemed beyond economical repair.
Customer:
What?! That…makes…me so angry!!!! arrrggghhh!!!
*series of swears, shatters and bangs followed by a dial tone*


Enter the Key to Success
I work at a phone company that supplies mobile internet connections.  I got a call from a customer one day complaining that her internet wasn’t working. After about ten minutes of the usual checks I realized that the customer was connected so I asked her to open an internet browser.

Agent:
Can you click in to the address bar and type www.google.com please?
Customer:
I've done this already and it didn’t work.
agent:
Will you do it again for me anyway?
Customer:
Alright.
Agent:
w-w-w-dot-g-o-o-g-l-e-dot-c-o-m and now press "enter".
Customer:
Oh, you have to press "enter"?

Party Zone
One late friday afternoon our office discussion centered on an upcoming party. Instead of answering a phone call with our standard greeting, "state power," I answered "state party." Thank goodness the person on the other end enjoyed it! he responded, "All right!"
Napplication
At our company, we take applications for service.

Caller:
Hello, I would like to speak with Steve please.
Phone Rep:
I'm sorry, Steve's taking an "app" right now. Is there something I can help you with?
Caller:
(irritated) Well, when Steve wakes up from his "nap" tell him to call me!

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